July 18, 2011

The State of Gigi...and a book review, of sorts

I should be posting about some of the fabulous books I've just read; like What the Night Knows by Dean Koontz or Mothers & Other Liars by Amy Bourett.....both of which were FABULOUS by the the way - or that other one that I read and can't quite remember the name of....it was quite funny though.

But I'm not posting about the books I've read.  Mainly, because I've already returned them to the library and don't have them around for reference (hence, why I'm leaving off the name for that other one) and because I've got too much other stuff floating around in my mind and, truth be told, only read to keep from obsessively thinking/worrying for a bit - and it worked, for a moment.  But I will add them to the Books I Love tab - even without the reviews - simply because I really did enjoy them and hope you will too.  Except for the one I forgot.  That one will have to languish alone on a bookshelf until I come across it again.  And I will come across it again.  Eventually.  I always seem to.

No, lately I've been more and more in total meltdown, panic mode.

That is the real reason I've been avoiding my friends  (and possibly, a lot of you, too) (I would also totally avoid my guys too, if I could - but dammit, they are ALWAYS here!).  I wrote about it here - oh wait, never-mind.  I never posted that.....obviously, because I was in total meltdown, panic mode.

See, those darling girls of mine want to go out and celebrate.  They want to have fun, spend some time together and celebrate me.  Sounds wonderful; doesn't it?

But me?  I'm not in that place right now.  Right now, I'm in a dark place.  A place where I don't want to go out and have fun, celebrate.

Needless to say, the girls are getting a *tad* aggravated with me at this point.  I don't blame them.  But then, due to some horrific news from far-away family (that I'm still trying to process so I can't/won't go into details now) to add on to everything else that is worrying me, I have been given an instant pass.  For the moment.  But these girls?  They won't let up.  I know them too well....

I'm tired, y'all.  Very, very tired.  And frozen.  Frozen from the fear and the panic.

You know how "they" say, "don't sweat the small stuff?"  Well, I have to wonder exactly what IS considered small?  Because lately, it seems like all the stuff I am facing isn't small.  It's GINORMOUS!

So in conclusion, to this very ramble-y post that does nothing but tell you about great books and the state of my mind....

Keep my dad in your thoughts and prayers as he is headed for surgery early, early tomorrow morning.  And I can't be there - because I'm here.  And that, of course, worries me.

16 comments:

  1. Thoughts and prayers for your Dad... and you, Gigi. I'm thinking about you. (If you need to unload, I'm here and I won't tell a soul)

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  2. Just another thing we have in common- obsessive reading to avoid reality. I do that CONSTANTLY and feel panicky when I'm out of books to read.

    I have no idea what that Google thing is that sends me emails, but congrats are in order for sure. I hope we can get some good news here for the same reason. *sigh*

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  3. I like to think that by worrying I keep things from happening. I'm always worried about stuff, mostly it never happens so I think my obsessibe worrying keeps the world together. Thoughts, prayers, good vibes and a margarita or two coming at ya darlin. Sit on the porch and cry, always helps, and keeps the neighbors from visiting.

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  4. Gigi .. I hope you are ok.. you know you can email me anytime..
    I am in a similar mode.. I am loosing myself writing a short story .. and loving it.. also reading a great book.. The Passage.. total gruesome fantasy.. violence all around.. as long as its on paper and not being played out all is well xx

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  5. I know how it feels when things seem out of your control, it sucks! Try to have some fun, worry is wasteful and it gives you wrinkles. Sending prayers xoxo

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  6. Oh Gigi, my thoughts will be with you. I have nothing cliché to say. Just know I will be wondering how you're doing.

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  7. Sorry to hear things are so tough right now! Your dad (and all your family) are in my prayers tonight.

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  8. Sorry things are so crappy now. Hopefully things will turn around soon!

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  9. My thoughts and prayers are with your dad and with you...I know how hard that is!

    I'm sorry you've had the glums. I feel like that too at times - where I just want to hunker down and lick my wounds (so to speak).

    I'm sending yo a big virtual hug. I hope things get better soon!

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  10. aww. sorry you're facing so much. Enjoy reading...

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  11. I hope your dad's surgery went well, Gigi.

    What you said at the end is so true...it's hard not to sweat the small stuff when it's all BIG stuff. Chin up, girl. It'll pass. Eventually. Sending positive thoughts your way.

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  12. Good luck with your ginormous stuff! And sending a prayer out for your dad.

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  13. Hope things went well for your dad. I feel bad that I missed this post- I had a little procedure myself and have been down for the count. Try to take it easy, but you MUST get out a little when you feel this scared. Because is it an ugly circle that just gets tighter and tighter. Maybe pick ONE girlfriend- who makes you laugh- and got our for an hour or two. Go check out a new shop, antique mall, etc. Be kind to yourself. HUGS

    PS- if you lived near me, I drag you out and make you eat ice cream. Or drink wine. One or the other!! ;-)

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  14. Aw, honey. I hope your dad came through the surgery with flying colors. Please know you're in my thoughts always...and that I wish I could take away your worry. You wanna send half of it my way??

    Yeah. I'd do that for you.

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  15. I'm sorry, I've not been a very good friend lately....I hope that the surgery went well and your dad is now on the way to recovery. Thinking of you. xx

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