August 4, 2016

Where I prove JUST how uncoordinated I really am...

Oh I look at me you'd think I was graceful and coordinated (HA!)...but in truth, I'm a klutz of the first order.

Proof?  Just look at the various bruises I sport on a daily basis...bruises I generally don't even know what caused them.

Apparently, I am my own worst enemy.

This was proven without a doubt Monday night...

It night was like any other night...The Husband was in the kitchen pottering around doing whatever it is he does in there while we discussed our day.  And by "discussed our day" I mean we complained about the things which annoyed us and laughed about the things that were ridiculous.

At some point during our evening, I reached up to scratch an itch near my eye.  And promptly stabbed myself in the eye with my nail.  The pain was brief and I didn't think much of it.  Until later, when The Husband walked up to me in search of a back scratch and exclaimed, "What the HELL did you to your eye?!?!"

Me, being completely clueless, replied that I'd done nothing.  He informed me that my eye was all red and bloody.  So naturally, I went to the nearest mirror to investigate.  And he was right.  The entire right side of the white of my eye was completely red.

It didn't hurt - so there was that.  But still...

The next day (and every day after that) I have had to explain to just about every single person that I came in contact with that I am an uncoordinated idiot who can't even scratch an itch without almost putting her own eye out.

Needless to say, I have been extra careful around my eyes lately - which makes putting in my contacts and doing my makeup super fun.

And now, everyone who walks by makes a point of stopping and evaluating my eye and telling me that it's looking better (while wincing and grimacing) - as if I haven't been monitoring it myself.  

I keep telling myself that they are wincing/grimacing because of how it looks and not because they are pained by the fact that I'm such a klutz who can't be trusted to keep her fingers out of her own damn eye...but you and I both know it's the fact that I'm such a klutz.


  1. I've had that red eye before, usually for no apparent reason a blood vessel bursts. You helped, though, I suspect. It's pretty funny from this vantage point, klutz. Can I call you that? :-)

  2. Glad you didn't do any serious damage. Now, please don't get a Red Ryder BB gun!