September 30, 2010

Why yes, sometimes I do go to extremes

Someone please tell me that I'm not the only one.

The other morning something happened that really made me upset at my husband.  I didn't mention it because we were in the midst of the usual morning madness.  Plus, I really didn't want to discuss the issue in front of Man-Child.

Apparently, Hubby picked up on the fact that I was upset (he does get points for that - because usually he's kinda dense in this area) because he called me at work after he dropped Man-Child off at school.  I told him that yes I was upset - but that I couldn't talk about it then.  I work in a cube farm - there is no way I'm about to have a personal conversation regarding the fact that at that very moment I was envisioning the various ways I could maim my husband when there are witnesses ears every where.

Throughout the morning, the more I thought about it the more upset I found myself.  I even threw in some other small issues that had been bothering me to stoke the fire.

Apparently, the fact that I was upset was really weighing on Hubby's mind - because he called back later in the morning to see if I wanted to have lunch (he gets extra points for taking it a step further to try and rectify the issue).  By now, my feelings were running very high.  I told him no.  I figured that I surely didn't want to have lunch with this horrible, no good man in a public forum.

The more I stewed over this issue - the hotter I got.  By the time I came home, I was spitting nails and ready to move out.  IT WAS OVER!  How DARE he treat me this way.

And you know what happened then?  We talked about it.  I discovered that he didn't do what I thought he had.  He was an innocent bystander caught in the crossfire.

The problem?  By now, I had worked myself into such a state that even though the "issue" was dead in the water - I was still angry.

I ended up going to bed early - hoping to sleep it off.  It worked.

The moral of the story?  Don't let the little things simmer - because eventually they will boil over.

We will have been married 20 years in January.  How many more times/years will I have to repeat this little nugget of wisdom to myself before it finally sinks in?

September 24, 2010

Sometimes you win-sometimes you lose, but in the end it's how you behave

Tonight marked our first loss this season.

Our boys were understandably upset.

It was a hard fought battle.  They had nothing to be ashamed of - they played valiantly and with all their hearts.

But what ticked me off more than anything (since you asked) was the opposing team's parents.  Excuse me, I don't mean to paint all of the opposing team's parents with the same brush.  No, what ticked me off was one "parent." And for that parent, the rest of this post is directed at you:

It is inexcusable to bull your way through the crowd of home team fans, bleating and gloating like an entitled cow.

Surely, had we been at your field and won - I know that our parents wouldn't act like that.  I know this because we've been in the same position as you.

Certainly your team won fair and square.  Of that there is no doubt.  But your behavior was totally obnoxious and reprehensible.  I can only hope that your son would have been embarrassed about your boorish behavior had he witnessed it.  I know mine would have been.  He would have died a thousand deaths to see me acting the way you did tonight.

You see, we have taught our children the code of "good sportsmanship."  We have taught them how to be gracious in victory.  Yes, you have every right to be happy that your team won.  No one is taking that away from you.  But your behavior leaves a lot to be desired.

Luckily, in your hurry to make your gloating known - and in your rush to get to your car (because God forbid, you be stuck in traffic) our boys missed it as they were still on the field shaking hands with the boys from your team and telling them, "good game."

Maybe, just maybe, had you seen their faces you might have realized that although these boys look like men they are still just boys.  Boys playing a game.  They played their hearts out and were devastated by the loss.

And your behavior in the parking lot.  Shameless.  Which unfortunately, our boys did witness, as did yours.

All I can say to you is this - you have no class.  And hopefully, the coaches on your son's team are teaching him the finer points of what it means to be a man.  Because you?  You aren't.

September 23, 2010

What's the method to your madness?

In chatting with some of you (and by chatting I mean either reading your blogs, reading your tweets, or actually tweet-chatting) I've realized that not everyone reads (or comments on) blogs in the same fashion.

Being a naturally curious (read nosy) person, it got me to wondering - what is your preferred method for reading and commenting?  Kathryn, I know, has a very complicated system regarding comments - one that works great for her but would probably drive me crazy (and yes, Kathryn, your post on it totally spurred this one on - so instead of stealing it outright, I just thought I'd borrow the idea.  You can have it back when you return that shirt you "borrowed" while hanging out in my closet the other night.).  Kathryn also once explained to me how she reads blog - but it sounded complicated too.

Me? I'm glad you asked.  I like to keep things nice and simple (quit snickering!  For the most part, I do like to keep it simple - really!  Okay, there are times I might make things over complicated - like deciding that the front flower bed - which according to everyone else was perfectly fine - needs to be completely re-done.... again...which with any luck we'll be moving forward on that project bright and early tomorrow).

Anyway, the preferred method to my madness is to log into my Blogger Dashboard - which from all my reading doesn't seem to be used by anyone but me.  It looks kinda like this:

Note to self: get a new profile picture - STAT!

What I like about the Dashboard is that it lists the most recently updated blogs that I follow on the right along with a snippet of the post.  On the left, it lists all the blogs I follow in alphabetical order.  The list of blogs I follow is particularly handy - since Blogger sometimes, completely out of the blue, picks one or two blogs and decides that I don't need to be updated when they post anymore.  With this format, I can quickly find those that are affected and click on their blog name to see if they've posted anything recently.  It's very helpful - because like I said, sometimes Blogger can be a bit pushy about what it thinks I need to read. Note to Blogger - stop that, it's annoying.

What I also like about this format is that *everything* is right at my fingertips.  If I want to check in on "followers" (as Blogger insists on calling them - I think of them more as "friends") I can just click on the followers link and viola!  There they are - ready for me to go visit (unless of course, they don't have their webpage linked to their name...which, just so you know - some of you don't, which may explain why I never visit - I can't find you!).  

If I want to re-design my blog (shudder), it's right there.  Check on Blogs of Note (note to self - you haven't done that in a while), it's right there.  If I want to post something completely random (like this post) - you guessed it - it's right there.  If I post something and then have writer's remorse, I can delete it before anyone sees it (hopefully) because it's right there.  If I am feeling extremely smart, I can even check stats from right there - I don't do that often though because I don't understand stats.  But it is fun to see where visitors might be dropping in from - like the one from Latvia - if I'm reading the stats right - they've visited 8 times! I wonder how a Latvian found me? 

I know that some of you utilize Google Reader; which I've tried - but it just seems far too cluttered for me.  Basically, I suppose, this is a long-winded way of asking - what's your preferred method?

Oh - and while I'm thinking about it - go check out your profile and make sure your blog is linked to it (and if you love me, link up your email address too - since that's my preferred way to respond to comments) so that I can come visit you.

And yes, I realize this is the lamest post ever but since I spent so much time piecing together that screen shot (I couldn't get it all in on one screen) - you get it anyway.

September 21, 2010

The rumors, they are a flying . . .

Some of you may remember that I mentioned not too long ago that we would be getting a New Top Dog.

Well, the New Top Dog has landed.  He has been with us for a week and some change.

Let me tell you - tongues, they are a wagging.  Rumors are flying about like you wouldn't believe.

For the most part, it's actually quite humorous.

Being located on the same floor as the New Top Dog and in a spot where I can see his door and all the comings and goings, I have been hit with many queries for all the "deets."

Unfortunately, for those who are asking I have very little details to share as the man in question has been tied up in many "get to know you" meetings for these past few days.

Considering that Old Top Dog has been with us for well over a decade people are curious.  Will New Top Dog drag this company, kicking and screaming, into the 21st century (or is it the 22nd now?  I can never keep all that straight)?  Will he be a visible Top Dog or will he hide in his office never to be seen?  The questions are many, let me tell you.  The answers remain to be seen - particularly since Old Top Dog is still here - effectively neutered but still nipping and growling.

I've been told that music has been heard in the early morning hours pouring out of his office.  Music? In this building; on this particular floor?  It's unheard of, I tell you.  This is the most solemn of floors - no laughter, no loitering, no MUSIC!!!  What's next?  All out frivolity?

The rumor that reached my ears today was an intriguing one.  It's been said that during his "get to know you" departmental meetings at our manufacturing facility he has decreed that the men no longer need to wear ties.  Scandalous!!!  This company has prided itself, lo these many years, of keeping that "professional" image spit shined.  It has further been rumored that once Old Top Dog leaves he may actually turn his sights onto "corporate" whereupon he will decree that every day will be "business casual."

This news caused my insides to quake.  While it may be well and good for the gentlemen to break free from that noose called a tie; I shudder to think what may happen in other areas.  I have witnessed for myself what some women deem as appropriate for our hard fought "business casual" Fridays.  I'm sure I've detailed some of the atrocities here.....what?  I haven't?  Possibly because I didn't want to be thought of as catty..... let's just leave it to your vivid imaginations, shall we?

I have a feeling that things are going to be getting very, very interesting around here in the next few months.....in more ways than one.

September 18, 2010

The One that Makes Me Sound Like a Bad Wife and Mother . . .

Apparently, I'm on a roll with the whole "bad person/wife/mother" thing this week.....

I did not attend Man-Child's game on Friday.

"Gasp! The nerve! What kind of mother are you anyway?!" I can hear you all asking.

Well, I have good excuses (notice the "s"?).  It's been a crazy week. (Excuse #1).  The new top dog started this week.  Since I don't work in that department it shouldn't be an issue.....but this week it was as we had to prepare for the presentation that our department had to give on Thursday.  Which meant that the majority of the department went a little crazy (because they are "last minute Louie's.") (Excuse #2).

Also, I have had the pleasure of waking up on the wrong side of the bed every single morning this past week (Excuse #3) for no apparent reason.  Friday morning took the cake though (Excuse #4) as I woke with a headache like you wouldn't believe and was exhausted (aren't you supposed to be refreshed and pain-free upon waking?) only to stumble into the kitchen to discover that we were out of coffee (despite my reminder to  someone to pick some up) (Excuse #5).  And, as we all know by now, Gigi in the morning (even with coffee) isn't a pretty sight.

I proceeded to feel pretty lousy throughout the day (Excuse #6) which I know was directly related to allergies - even though I tried to stay on top of the medication throughout the day.  It didn't help that I've been a little down this week (Excuse #7).

Upon arriving at work, I was assaulted by the mob (Excuse #8) all day long.

Then we have the fact that Hubby has apparently mastered the art of annoying me to no end by just breathing (Excuse #9).

Altogether, this means that getting in a car with a man who can't even breathe right and driving with him to a game that is an hour away (do the math, people.  That equals TWO hours in the car - one of which will include a very smelly, stinky Man-Child) meant that I would surely lose it on Hubby (whose only fault is that he can't breathe right) (Excuse #10) and that it would all turn out very ugly.

So, in the end, I decided it would be best for me to stay home, take some more allergy medication and go to bed early.

And, upon reflection, all this probably means that I'm just a bad wife - and a good mother.  Because really?  A good mother wouldn't let her child witness the kind of mayhem that could have possibly ensued had I gone, with a headache and not feeling well, in the car with a man who just can't breathe right.

September 17, 2010

The One That Makes Me Sound Like a Bad Person......

First of all, for the record, let me state that I believe, for the most part, that the United Way does good work, but......

I completely and totally resent the strong arm tactics that are employed in corporations year after year to "encourage" employees to donate.

The kick-off luncheons - where it is frowned upon if you don't attend and eat your hotdog - is billed as "social" time for you to come together as one big happy corporate family.  It is anything but - the luncheon is served in the smallest possible break room which pretty much forces everyone to carry the food back to their desk - which inevitably means you end up working through your lunch.  The one hour a day that you are allowed to be away from your desk and co-workers.  Strike one.

Then, they have a film that you are strongly encouraged by the corporate "representative" to watch.  If you don't respond to the first "personal" email blast invitation to come watch the film you will then continue to receive an email invitation on a daily basis until you either capitulate and respond or until the kick-off season is over (and, I'm sure, a black mark is noted next to your name on a list somewhere-to complement the other black mark from when you didn't "attend" the luncheon).  Strike two.

If the film isn't enough to "guilt" you into contributing the highest amount you can possibly give (thereby eating up your charitable donation budget for the year) - then they send around a corporate "representative" (who by now is beginning to remind you of a mobster) to hand out the contribution sheets which so thoughtfully gives you the option of making your contribution by a payroll deduction (so you won't even miss it!).  While handing you the sheet, and reminding you of the film that you "really" need to see, you are subtly reminded that "our department always has a 100% contribution rate" and that if you contribute you will be entered into a drawing for a "prize!" (what might that be, Mr. Mobster? To not have my knees broken?)  Strike three.

As I stated earlier, I do believe that they do good work and would contribute anyway; but I truly resent the pressure that is exerted.  I'm not kidding when I say I feel like I'm the little shopkeeper in the 'hood who has to "make his payments" so that I don't have any "trouble."

I resent that other worthy causes are given absolutely no corporate support at all.  I do realize that companies can't possibly endorse every worthwhile project that comes along - but just how did the United Way worm their way into corporate America in such a way that feels so wrong?  That feels so much like extortion?

I mentioned awhile back that I am involved in the school supply drive for the needy schools in our area.  The company has given us the okay to work on this project.  But that's it.  We are allowed to put up a small tripod, with a small poster and a small box in each break room.  We are not allowed to use the inter-company website to post an announcement or a reminder.  We aren't allowed to use company email to promote it.  Presumably, so as not to "guilt" people into giving or to give the impression that the company "endorses" this venture (but, you can bet they don't mind any publicity they may receive for being such a good corporate citizen....).

But to then turn around and create the atmosphere of "give or else....." seems hypocritical to me.  And every year as I make my contribution - which I always direct to helping women and children in our county - I resent it just a bit more.  Not the giving, mind you.  But the tactics used to "ask" me to give.

September 16, 2010

Sometimes I procrastinate

I'm supposed to be typing out a real post.  You know, one that has some sort of form and substance.

I even have the subject matter locked and loaded.  But I just can't seem to make myself sit down and do it.

Instead, I've been playing catch up and reading what I've missed while I was without access.  I'm all caught up now (sans comments though, sorry!).

Instead of sitting down and typing a post I've been figuring out how to move my iTunes library and set up Office - done.

Instead of writing, I've finally downloaded and cropped this picture:

No, that's not sweat - they took pictures in the rain!

Which I've also been meaning to do forever.  Another thing done; at the expense of my post.

To explain the lengths that I've gone to procrastinate, I even took the time to post it on FaceBook - surely that tells you something.

And now? Instead of writing the post I've been meaning to write for the past two days; now I am writing this one.

It defies explanation.

But apparently, sometimes I have to procrastinate in order to get other things done.

September 15, 2010

Where I've Been

I do realize I recently prefaced another post along the same lines - but this time I've really been gone.

No, not gone, gone.  But I've been without Internet since Monday.  It has been a purely hellish experience let me tell you.

If you follow along on Twitter - then you already knew this.  And if you don't well, don't feel bad you really aren't missing anything since most of my Tweets are even more random and disjointed than this little slice of blogland seems to be.

I've been trying to keep up with all that you've been doing via the Blackberry.  Now, while the Blackberry is AWESOME and I love it to death - let's just say it has it's quirks when it comes to reading/responding to blogs. As a result of those quirks - I've missed A LOT and have made next to no comments on any of those that I have been able to read.

So, what have I been up to in my un-connected life?  Well, let's just say I wasn't as productive as I could have been sans interruptions.....

I didn't write anything.  Which I am kicking myself for - because just think what kind of crap gold I could have come up with during all that time!

I certainly didn't use the opportunity to clean house - as evidenced by the dust bunnies roaming freely and procreating at will.

What I did do - well.........

I played solitaire.  A lot!  Unfortunately my win-loss ratio did not improve one iota.  Which is just irritating. I mean generally with practice you improve.  With solitaire practice simply does not matter.  If the cards you are dealt are awful then you are just out of luck, which I suppose could be a metaphor for life sometimes (such as getting dealt the no Internet card....).

After getting bored extremely frustrated with solitaire I did manage to do some computer maintenance (which I have been neglecting.....) and even got my pictures in some kind of order (meaning I just put them in folders - I still need to sort/name/back them up - which will probably happen next time catastrophe strikes and we lose the Internet for any length of time.....).

I also made a list (yes, another one) of all the things I still need to do - such as figure out how to copy my iTunes library onto the Notepad, figure out how to enable Office on the Notepad, etc.

During these dark hours, I realized even without Internet I am connected to the computer - as evidenced by the fact that most of the things I did accomplish all had something to do with the computer.

So what does this tell me?

Apparently, I need to get a life.

September 7, 2010

So is THIS where technology is taking us?

Hubby just popped his head through the door to inform me that we've been invited to a friend's birthday party.

My first thought?

Have I become such a hermit of late that my friends are now completely bypassing me and going directly to Hubby in hopes of receiving an affirmative to whatever occasion they might be hosting?

Turns out this is not the case at all, which is good, because otherwise I'd be all kind of offended.

Apparently, the invite was posted on FaceBook for all to see and respond.

Not even a personal email invite?!  The nerve.  I realize that apparently the days are long gone when I could walk out to the mailbox and actually open a physical envelope with an invitation (although I must say, that I continue to send invitations that way.....I'm just sayin......and yeah, you'll most likely receive a handwritten thank you note from me too.....).

Nope, I have evolved with the times.  I can easily accept an emailed invite that was sent to me and a bunch of others.  But to be invited via an open invitation on FaceBook?  Well, that just offends me - on a whole different level than the thought of bypassing me (the official scheduler of this family!) completely.

Where is the personal touch?  Where is the love? Where is the feeling of "we are having an intimate gathering of 300 people and would love for you to be there?"  Where is that "you are, oh so special, that you are invited" feeling.

I'll tell you where - it's NOT there!  At all.

I'm feeling unloved and not very special right now.

September 5, 2010

A long, rambling post and new shoes - everybody wins! *Updated*

Hi!!!  It's so good to be back!

What do you mean - you haven't missed me??  It's been three (count 'em THREE) days since my last post.  Technically, six - since the last one doesn't count.....

*sigh* It doesn't count because I had to unburden myself from all that knowledge that I'm not allowed to tell Hubby about - remember?

So basically, except for a few stray comments, here and there, I've been missing in action.  No particular reason why (I have had plenty to say and have mentally composed several posts over the past few days - but they seem to have been forgotten errr, misplaced.)  Other than the aforementioned drama, life has been pretty quiet here in Gigi-land.

As many of you are aware, it's a long weekend here - it's been extra long for me as my company is kind enough to close both the Friday before Labor Day and on Labor Day.  So despite some of their faults - they get extra credit for this alone.  I guess they figure that all of our extra-hard labor earns us an extra day.

So Friday dawned with me awakening to an empty house.  Usually, this is cause for jubilation.  But, I suppose with the boys having been gone last weekend, I was looking for some companionship.  But Man-Child was in school and Hubby had taken himself fishing - leaving me to my own devices.  Usually this is a good thing as it sometimes results in productive activity - such as cleaning house, working in the yard or actually coming up with a decent post.  None of that happened.

Instead, I ended up taking numerous pictures of myself.  Why?  I don't know.  I was bored and felt like I needed a new picture for the blog and it's not like anyone in this house (other than me) is taking any pictures.  After about half an hour of that tomfoolery - I looked at the results and was not pleased at all.  According to all the pictures I took - I have a HUGE forehead and felt that this look needed to be remedied ASAP!

So I took myself upstairs and proceeded to cut my bangs - yes, I know - this is not an activity that one should normally undertake by oneself - but desperate times folks!  Besides, I've cut my bangs before without too terribly bad results....I've learned if I do it little by little and I leave the rest of it alone - I'm probably okay.

Truth be told, I was kind of pleased with the results - no more HUGE forehead staring back at me in the mirror.  Why is it that I have looked in the mirror every day for however long it's been and I never noticed - but as soon as I took those pictures it was glaringly obvious? I have informed Hubby that he has failed in his duty as a husband to tell me that I was wearing my hair all wrong.  He didn't seem too upset by that announcement.  In fact, I'm pretty sure he was ignoring me.

After cutting my bangs - I took a few more pictures and put that one up - it will have to do for now until I can get some decent pictures taken.  My arms are only so long, you know, and I'd probably prefer one that is taken a bit further away......so for now, we'll just call that one "artistic" and live with it for a bit - unless you all hate it and then we'll put the old one back (maybe).

After the longest day ever - came the football game.  This time, I made it to the game early enough to actually find a spot on the bleachers so I could actually see.  Our boys did good.  We won 49-0.  It actually sounds better than it is (according to Hubby and Man-Child) as these last two games we've played have not been against impressive teams.  So next week will tell the tale as we are playing a much tougher team.  But Man-Child got a lot of playing time - and apparently took out the quarterback causing an interception; which somehow I completely missed - I must have blinked or something.  It's hard to keep your eye on your player as they are all dressed alike out there.  I have suggested putting a splash of pink on his helmet so that I can find him in the sea of bodies on the field - he did not appreciate my suggestion in the least.

Saturday was completely uneventful.  COMPLETELY.  In fact, Man-Child dramatically informed me that he fully expected to expire of boredom before this weekend is over.  As he was still alive and well, last time I checked on him I expect he may live after all.

This morning I awoke to a surprise - Hubby was up and about (that's not the surprise) and so was Man-Child (that was the shocker!).  I had to check the time to make sure that it was in fact still morning.  It was.  After a few chores I left to run some errands.

Can you imagine my shock when I discovered that a local shoe store (that I never visit because it is so far away it may as well be in Virginia) has relocated right down the road from me?  As I paid for my purchase (what? Surely you know I had to buy something so as to encourage the local economy!), I informed the guy who rang me up that my husband was not going to be happy with their new location.  He just laughed.  He must have thought I was kidding.  I fully expect that he and I will be on a first name basis before long and that he, will in fact, be calling me on my cell to tell me all about the latest inventory.

As I was sitting in the parking lot taking a picture of my newest pretties (you know you've done it too) to send  out to Twitterland and a few friends - I got some odd looks.  But mainly these looks were from men - who obviously do not realize that this is normal.  But look, aren't they gorgeous?


Obviously, not the best photo - as you really can't see the detail too well - but to be fair, I was sitting in the car in the parking lot.  I can't wait for fall to get here so that I can wear these lovelies.  I suppose I could wear them now with a cute skirt as the kids do - but alas, I'm not a kid - so I'll just have to wait.  I was able to smuggle them into the house without any trouble as Hubby and Man-Child were out when I arrived home.

So anyway, you see what happens when I am away from Blogland too long - you get a long, rambling account of what my weekend has been like and I end up with new shoes.  So everybody wins!

Now, since the bang-cutting was such a success, I'm off to dye my hair.  I mean really, what could possibly go wrong?


*****
Thank you DJan for reminding me about the date stamp on the profile picture!  I'd meant to deal with that earlier - but it completely slipped my mind!  I don't know what I'd do without my friends to keep me headed in a semi-straight path.....

September 2, 2010

Where do you draw the line?

My dear, dear friend has been in the midst of a separation.  For her - it's not a trial; at least that's what she says - but her actions are another thing.  To her husband - it's just until she regains her senses and lets him come back home.

I believe I've mentioned them before.  They are both very dear friends and we love them to death.  Actually, they are more family than they are friends.

Despite this - there is no way in hell that I could have ever been married to this man.  In fact, we all used to joke about it.  How if Gigi and Mr. X were married that only one would make it out alive after one day.  And just where would Gigi dump the body?  We would laugh and laugh.  Mainly, because we all knew it was true.

My dear friend, Mrs. X has put up with a lot through the years.  I can understand.  She loves/loved him.  She has borne his three children.

But there has to be a limit.  Right?  There has to be a point where enough is enough.

And apparently, she has finally hit that point.

Well, to be fair, there have been several times during the past 8 months that I thought she had hit that point to where she was ready to move forward and completely sever the relationship and call it quits - only to be surprised.  I have been here for her and trying to help without actually saying anything too negative about her husband.  Because we all know how that can explode on you should they actually get back together and because, all in all, he's not a bad guy (even though, in my opinion, he is a horrible husband and life partner).  But at the same time, I'd try to gently make her realize the things she needed to do for her and the children - legally.

I realize that divorce is not something that should be taken easily but in this instance, I really felt it was best for her and the children.  I also realize that the only person who could make this decision is my friend.  And I also know, that she is a "waffle-r."  Whereas I am (usually) one who makes up her mind and then it is done.  But I also realize that calling it quits to 17 years (or more) of marriage isn't an easy one.  So, I've just been pretty much here for her and listening to her go back and forth.

Until last night.  When she called me and she was unbelievably angry (which is so unlike her).  And after what I heard - I was unbelievably angry as well.

Apparently, they've had a very informal (nothing in writing, etc) that he would pay "these" bills and she would pay "those."  And she, the gentle soul that she is, trusted that he was doing as he said he would.  (Why, I'll never know - I would never trust this man to handle financial issues....)  Apparently, something came up and she called the bank whereupon she discovered, completely by accident, that, in addition to whatever other issue she was having, the house was about to be put in foreclosure because he hadn't been paying the mortgage.  She had no idea.  She was totally floored.

Somehow she scrounged up the money and took cash to the bank and was able to stave off the foreclosure - for now.  She couldn't believe that he had lied to her about something of this magnitude.  Apparently, he had even gone so far as to collect the mail from the house, signed and hid a letter from the bank informing them of the impending foreclosure.  All without saying a word.  Acting like all was right with the world, while behind her back he was pulling the rug out from under her feet.

Needless to say, she was livid.  The thought that he could try and hide something like this; the fact that he'd let the bank foreclose on the house where his children live.  His reasoning, when confronted, was that they can't "really take the house for at least a year."

Apparently, this was my friend's limit.  Today she contacted an attorney.  She plans to get things in place, legally, to protect her and the children.  I really hopes she goes through with it - particularly since he is "claiming" that he is going out of the country to work (again, I don't buy it - but if he does go she needs to have some legal protection in place).

Because this, in my mind, is one of the ultimate betrayals.  Your family - YOUR CHILDREN - are counting on you and rather than "man up" and admit that you are in a bind you hide it? We all have hard times financially.  It happens.  You do what you have to do to take care of your family.  You don't hide it.  If you have to sell and move - you do so.  You don't hide it like a naughty child and hope no one ever finds out.  How did he plan on explaining it to those three kids when "they" did come to take their home away?

She has begged me not to say anything to Hubby for various reasons that I can understand.  So for the moment, I've not said a word (which is killing me).  But I have to tell you - although Mr. X can be a great guy - I have completely lost any and all respect for him - because anyone who can be so cavalier with his family?  Yeah, they aren't so great after all.