April 9, 2022

"COVID Connection" coming soon to a building near me

 Well, so much for the "choose your own days" for our hybrid work model.

Last week we received a missive from the "communications department" - which basically means "the powers that be" dictated the communication and directed that department to spread the word.

Basically, it boiled down to the fact that a scheduled in-person day is being introduced to encourage "connectivity and collaboration" (and possibly COVID - of course, this bit was added by me).  So the two-day in office now mandates one of those days for EVERYONE to be in the office on a certain day.  And that we should plan to utilize in-person meetings and discussions. Masks optional, of course.

(Seems to me, someone has been counting noses and noticed that some people haven't been following the rules.  So, in the time honored tradition of corporations everywhere - rather than punishing the rule breakers they punish the entire company.)

Oh, that sound you hear?  That's just me screaming into the void.

As you might assume, I have MANY thoughts on this issue (especially as I am keeping a VERY careful eye on the latest data for our county) but I will keep them to myself as I continue to remind myself that all in all I am very lucky.  Very lucky.  They could have just said, "You know what?  Plan to come in five days a week from now on."  But that doesn't mean I have to like it - no matter how lucky I am.

Never mind the fact that my job doesn't usually involve collaboration or the fact that I would much rather walk across burning coals than "connect" with some of these people.

Then, to add insult to injury, it was announced that a "team building" exercise is coming next month.  The leadership team has already participated in this exercise and thinks it is "wonderful" and will do much to foster "connectivity and collaboration" among us peons.  Someone shoot me now.

I think in my next life, I am going to have a career as a consultant.  God knows these corporations spend boatloads of money on hiring people to tell them how to foster "connectivity and collaboration" with their employees.  Then I can sit back and laugh while I count my millions of dollars while the peons at the corporation waste valuable time on the ridiculous "team building" exercise that I have recommended

Yes.  That's my solid plan for my next life.

16 comments:

  1. Ugh, sorry Gigi, that sounds not-great. It's too bad your leadership team seems to think the pandemic is over. I wish you lots of luck.

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    1. Thank you, Nicole. I'm hopeful that someone will look at what's going on and re-instate the masks, at the very least. If I knew we were all masked I'd feel a little better about the whole thing.

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  2. This is the way things are going all over the corporate world now. They are seeing the rent and utility payments go out for these empty buildings and offices they are leasing and it's affecting the Almighty Bottom Line. That's business. So much for "Corporations are people", right?

    The stuff you're describing makes me shudder. I hated it when it was packaged to us in Education and labelled Professional Development and Inservice. It's always crap, no matter what they call it. My sympathies.

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    1. Corporate America...what can I say? The team building exercises will be huge waste of time for all involved and without any benefit most likely.

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  3. I read about it all from your and other employed people's websites. I am just so glad I'm retired!

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  4. You are very lucky to be out of the rat race!

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  5. Any chance you can do this now, in the present lifetime?

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    1. The way things are going I may have to look into it!

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  6. WOW. So much for what you thought was a decent 'going back in' proposal.

    But hey, did you catch a glimpse of the Oscars? (I saw some bits the next day) No masks and they were ALL in there close together. If Hollywood says it's over, isn't it over? **That is me being sarcastic; I loathe Hollywood!**

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    1. I am appalled whenever I see scenes like that (Oscar's, football games, etc.). I look at them and think, "Have we learned NOTHING over the past few years?!" Apparently, some of us haven't.

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  7. Ugh ugh ugh! WHY are companies doing this??? I don't understand at all - remote work is GOOD! Why make everyone come back in?!?

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    1. Good question. I think it comes down to the fact that they can.

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  8. This sounds lousy. I know my husband has thrived working remotely, but companies own the buildings so I guess they want to use them. I like your plan for your next life, consulting is where the money is and the germs aren't.

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    1. Remote work has been my jam - I do it much better here than I ever did in the office.

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  9. If people weren't connecting and doing team building during the remote work situation and the company did not fold, why are they demanding it now? Changing diapers as a career doesn't seem so bad right about now. Good luck.

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  10. I'd love to work from home but until they set up that system from my house to 650 homes 15 miles away to shoot the mail through, Alas, I am stuck with fending off cooties. Though to be fair, my corner is pretty conscious about not spreading germs. dirt on the other hand, is a different story. Mail is FILTHY.

    Fun fact: We had 87 lights out in our building. They replaced them all yesterday and today. It's like angels are descending from the heavens now. And if you stand back, you can actually see the smog like dirt cloud we are all breathing. *sigh* 9 years 6 months til retirement.

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