May 19, 2021

Priorities...his, mine and ours

 Swistle's most recent post got me to thinking...well, actually I have been thinking this for a while but that post made me want to articulate what I've been thinking.

As we all know, there are MANY projects that I would love to have done around here - including that stupid front door that STILL isn't done.  In fact, there has been absolutely NO progress on this front.

Yes, I should probably step in and start making phone calls...but, here's the thing...he knows more about this kind of thing than I do and has connections that I don't.  

BUT - The Husband, who has been dithering over whether or not to fix or replace the shed for the last year or so finally made a decision.  And *just like that* the shed has been fixed and re-painted - and from the time it took for him to make the decision to completion was just two weeks.  Imagine.

But yet, here we are THREE years later and that front door?  Apparently, not a priority in his book...despite the fact that he *just* remarked how dreary the house is when it's overcast. *sigh*

Now, I'm not going to lie...having the shed usable is great, as the garage doesn't need to house EVERY.SINGLE.THING! and I am reaping the benefits of it.  But, I'm a tad resentful, as that seems to have had a higher priority to the one, little thing that I desire.

All this tells me that, sometimes it seems that my priorities seem to take a backseat to his priorities.  And we need to have a conversation about that.

But then, sometimes our priorities happen to align...aka The Juniper.  

This is only a portion of it - it spans the entire front yard,
including the other side of the driveway.

We both agree it is an eyesore - infested with weeds and snakes.  And, the majority of it should be removed next week.  Hopefully.  

After the door debacle, as you might imagine, I have my doubts...but *fingers crossed*

Next on the list?  That damn front door.

21 comments:

  1. Gigi,
    I have a question and it may be an ignorant question, but here goes -- I read your story about how the vendor screwed up your door order, etc. and now you've lost faith in Lowe's and the other place; but what's wrong with the door you currently have on hinges? Is it the style? The color? Is it broken? Because sometimes an easy and less expensive option is just to re-paint it a color you like. If you have a Next Door App, sometimes you can ask the neighborhood who they recommend for repairs, contract work, etc. I'd just follow up and vet the "handyman" very well. I hope this helps. :) Mona

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    1. Hi Mona - There's actually nothing wrong with the door; other than the ugly paint color. The problem is that this house gets very little natural light in the main living area. A new door - with the glass panels across the top would let let in and still not be a privacy issue.

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  2. So, your house is lovely from this angle. Can't see the door though. Or the snakes, thank goodness. As far as replacing the door - have you tried being less than subtle? Like "Honey, fix the door!". There's something to be said about the 'squeaky wheel' strategy - it does get the action accomplished quickly.

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    1. Barbara - believe me, he hears about the door on a near daily basis - but for him, it's just not a priority.

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  3. Infested with weeds and SNAKES. Yikes! Your house looks lovely to me but I can't see the door :)

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    1. Yikes, indeed! But the guy should start work on the juniper on Monday!

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  4. Your home is so pretty! And you have a porch! Do NOT invite those snakes up for a lemonade. They will never get the hint to leave. :)

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    1. Thank you, Kari! My hope is that by ripping out the juniper those snakes will just move on down the road!

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  5. As soon as I saw the first snake, I'd be out there with a blowtorch to burn it all down.

    So frustrating when priorities misalign. Like how I desperately want NEW WINDOWS and yet cannot persuade my husband that they are worth the expense. SIGH. (okay, so new windows are a sight different from a new door. but I hear you!)

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    1. Luckily, I haven't actually witnessed a snake going in or out of there but The Husband has...and made the mistake of telling me about it.

      I feel you on the windows - we need those too...but are further down on the list. My argument would be the energy savings one. And, although it might cost more in the long run but, you could try to replace them piecemeal...it wouldn't hit the pocketbook so hard as doing it all at once.

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  6. I'm always amused and slightly annoyed when I mention something to my husband that i find annoying/broken/outdated that needs to fixed or addressed in someway and many times he says, "That isn't bad. Doesn't bother me at all!" Those things definitely need more conversation in order to "get on the same page!" I hope you get the door of your dreams soon!

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    1. Those pesky spouses...they never see things the way we do.

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  7. Painting the foundation has been on my list for like, a year. I finally got around to doing it and he was like "WHY????" And then he saw it done. And he understood.

    Next on the list, a seriously needed dump run. Not trash mind you, but big stuff... office chairs, old wood, that picnic table that I accidently cut in half with the skill saw, etc. etc.

    I'm not holding my breath.

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    1. Ok, now I want to hear the story about how you accidently cut the picnic table in half...

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    2. It's a far less exciting story than the one that unfolded when I had to break all that stuff down into recyclables and actual trash... because the hard to manage dump is closed indefinitely. *sigh* Hubs is off on Friday, I said, "I need you to run the recycles to the dump." He says, "isn't that why we have trash service?" I said, "Dude. You're off, and I'm gonna tell you what I want done. End story."

      We'll see if he actually runs everything I broke down to the dump. After all, it is a whole 4 miles up the road.

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  8. I hear you on tbe project priorities not matching up. My other issue is thst Coach is handy but once he completes a handyman job he rarely puts the tools away. Mind blowing.

    Also I hate my front door. I had a new front door at our old house and SHOULD HAVE insisted on removing the custom stained glass windows from it before we moved. Celtic designs in the glass. I drive by my old house sometimes and stare longingly at my old door. I even called the door place before I moved but the guy said nothing they could do. A different guy from same store later told me it was completely doable. *sobbing*

    I hope you A. Rid your property of snakes and B. Get the new door.

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  9. I would think that the juniper is a bigger problem than the door, but then again, what do I know? Your house looks lovely to me. :-)

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  10. I completely understand your frustration on this. Priorities. Why can't OUR priority be theirs?
    I hope you get that juniper out this week and I know that will make you happy. The snakes might be mad, but oh well!

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  11. I HEAR YOU! Patience has never been my Virtue to begin with, and my husband has it in spades. That, and an overwhelming desire for Procrastination. He is also a carpenter/contractor, so he does everything himself. Projects at my house are endless and infinite, rarely reaching full completion unless I completely lose it.

    Your priorities will almost never match up with his. You know this, right? What worked for me--for a long time until he caught on--was saying, "I'm going to do________ tomorrow. Exactly what kind of (paint, stain, screws, etc) will I need?" I got a lot of projects done that way until he started calling my bluff.

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  12. Yep. I feel your pain and relate to it. I've found myself in similar situations with my husband. Nance's way of nudging a project forward is brilliant.

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