As I sit here and type this I am in shock.
Literally.
I am remembering way, way, way back when my little guy (still only 4!) started kindergarten (he barely made the cut off date. We only sent him because we felt he was "ready" and figured we could always hold him back if it turned out he wasn't. I mean, seriously, it's kindergarten).
Turns out this child of mine takes after his mom; because he EXCELLED in school. Truly. The only issues we ever had was his "exuberance" and his penchant for SHOUTING out the answers (although that, obviously came from his father. Because I never did those things!).
Seriously. These were the only issues the teachers ever brought up in our meetings.
Then came 5th grade. What happened, I don't know. (I still blame his father) But all of a sudden, this "super-star" became an "okay" student.
Don't get me wrong. He passed everything. But never put in any effort. Ever.
As in he wouldn't turn in his homework. He'd DO the homework; but never turn it in. He'd do a project - but it would always be at the last minute and it would be the most slapdash thing you'd ever seen (even with me giving direction at midnight - I admit, some of these projects I was ashamed to say I had a hand in. And I must point out, had I known about these projects previously we sure as hell wouldn't have been doing them at midnight!); but somehow would pull an okay grade (this really made me crazy!).
Drove me INSANE!
We talked about it. We punished. We begged. We were at a loss. We had no idea of what it would take to get through to this kid. How to impress upon him the importance of doing well in school.
Nothing changed.
We knew he could do better if he'd just "apply" himself. But he wouldn't.
Now, we aren't the type of parents that insist on all A's every single time - OR ELSE. All we ever asked was for him to do his best. And clearly, he wasn't.
I despaired (and blamed his father - because surely this had something to do with HIS genetic makeup).
But then Man-Child hit high school. And life, clearly, wasn't the same anymore.
We struggled through his freshman year. But the struggle wasn't as strenuous.
His sophomore year - a bit better. A little better planning, homework was getting turned in - eventually.
His junior year MUCH better. Awesome planning. All homework turned in. Albeit, some of it still done at the last minute; or late - but the frequency of this was much less than the previous year.
But so far this year (knock wood)? His senior year - is off to a stellar start. Especially considering he just made me sit down and listen (for the better part of an hour) to his "plan" for his first project. Including all the supplies he would need to complete said project.
The project that still has some time to go before it is finished.
All is right with the world again. Because CLEARLY (despite the slight deviation) he takes after ME.
I always knew it.
Of course he takes after you! Glad he is off to such a great start.
ReplyDeleteWe worry about our kids more than we ever did about our OWN grades. And the cycle continues. I wonder how it will be with him and his kids... :-)
ReplyDeleteThree of mine, clearly took after me and didn't give two hoots about school, even though they were plenty intelligent. Thankfully, one of them was naturally brilliant and breezed through with honors and little effort.
ReplyDeleteIt's so awesome that things have gotten better. What's best is that things got better because of him, not because of nagging parents. That's the kind of attitude that can last, and won't go away as soon as he's out of the house, you know?
ReplyDeleteMy kids get all their good stuff from me and all their bad from their dad. That is my philosophy and it serves me well
ReplyDeleteYou know, Gigi, you're 'little guy' sounds just like mine...only a couple of years older.
ReplyDeleteOur boy isn't at that point of 'producing the work without threats' yet. He is just starting high school (grade 10 here) next week.
May be in touch for advise and moral support.
Must buy sedatives.
You just described my son to a "T"!! He just started his junior year though, and I'm still waiting for those changes to take place. He's slightly better, I guess. Slightly. It's so frustrating!
ReplyDeleteCongratulations on your boy's transformation!
This totally cracked me up. I too have a son who takes after his father one day and me the next. They're Dr. Jekyll's and Mr. Hyde's I tell ya.
ReplyDeleteMy son with autism is also a senior this year. I think back to those days when I wondered if he would ever graduate high school and I'm amazed that he has come this far.
ReplyDeleteSandy
I can only hope- Jason's in 2nd and Adam in in K. Fingers crossed. For mine and for yours.
ReplyDeleteOh Gigi, I can soooo relate! I have the same kid (although I bet he's taller than yours! Mine is 15 yrs old and 6 foot tall already!...definitely doesn't get that from me!) I was told by his grade 1 teacher that he was brilliant! Then by grade 4-5, I was being told...well, nothing because he wasn't handing anything in. Then this year, he is taking physics, chemistry, pre-calculus, and talking about going to med school....whose kid is this and what have they done with my completely unambitious one?
ReplyDeleteI am so dreading when Bryson starts school next year!! I hated the homework and projects with my girls and I have a feeling that Bryson is going to be as hard headed as his mother.
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