Mulling over office politics.....and sucking you into it, by default

After a conversation with Hubby last night, I've been wondering....

First, since I try to stay away from office gossip here, a bit of background - the Big Guy in my department is getting married.  This really isn't news to anyone, we've seen it coming.  And, as you may remember, he has recently become one that I actually report to (even though it's all been shrouded in mystery and is hush-hush - because GOD-FORBID should anyone speak it aloud-you know, now that I think about it, I don't think even HR knows....).  Granted, I reported to him before, technically, in a distant sort of fashion - as in my bosses reported to him - but now, he has been gathered into the fold, you might say, and now I report to many; including him directly (actually, they report to me, they just don't know it yet).

So anyway....we knew he was getting married.  And we were happy for him - because if  he is happy - then, by default, don't we benefit in some way??

When the "Save the Date" cards went out we all kind of knew we were invited; because, otherwise, why else would we have received them?  To taunt us?  But no one really discussed it - because it was MONTHS away and (heaven forbid!) what if you DID discuss it with someone and they hadn't received the "Save the Date" card?

As a quick aside - don't you love the idea of "Save the Date" cards?  It gives you so much time to plan!  Theoretically, speaking....as I haven't even BEGUN to figure out what I'm going to wear to this thing!

This weekend, we all received the OFFICIAL invitations.  Needless to say, it was the buzz among the peons in the office this morning.

One woman came to me and asked if I was going.  I responded that I was going, of course - (I didn't tell her this but, yeah, I'm going; because:  One - he thought enough of me to actually INVITE me to a very intimate and personal ceremony; Two - because there will be an open bar (I KID! I KID!) Three - he is my BOSS and he actually thought enough of ME to INVITE me [and Hubby, but not Man-Child, odd I think, as he isn't small and would like to meet some of the people I work with] to this very intimate and personal ceremony and Four - did I mention the food that is going to be served is AMAZING?  Hello?!)  So, yes, I'm definitely going.

She then informed me that So-N-So and so-n-so weren't planning to attend.  My mind was kind of blown at that point.  I understand that So-N-So and so-n-so have had their "issues" with the Big Guy in the past.  I get it; I do.  But seriously?  I then informed this woman that she HAD to attend - in no uncertain terms (mainly because I do need a friend to hang out with at this shindig!  Besides Hubby, that is, because he will wander off.  I know him).  She agreed, uncertainly. So uncertainly, in fact, that I'll be surprised if she shows up.  But, upon further reflection, knowing her, she'll show up out of obligation and guilt.

As I was explaining this all to Hubby (it's intricate, I know.  But somehow, he followed it all) he was flabbergasted that they weren't attending.

It seems to me that, if you are on the "outs" with the boss, it would behoove you to show up at a personal event (you know, one that I won't be doing an expense report for) that he invites you to as it seems that he is "trying" to extend an olive branch and that he would like you would take it.  What really strikes me though, especially with these two, is that they are smart, professional women who have been around the "corporate block" a time or two don't realize this.

Yes, there is a time to "stand your ground" and then there is a time to be gracious (I mean, seriously?  You should see this menu and the venue!).  And, personally, I feel they are being a bit petty.  Is it just me?

To be fair, I haven't gone into all the "issues" that surround this situation, and I know emotions run high, but still....it's this guy's WEDDING day!  And he has invited us to join in his joy.  So, putting the menu (and open bar - I KID!  I will NOT get drunk at my boss' wedding - what do you guys take me for? An idiot?) aside, wouldn't you want to celebrate the happiness of another?  But on the other hand, I haven't been treated the way they claim to have been treated.

So what do you think?  Should they put aside their differences and attend?  Or should they hold their "moral" high ground and not attend?

Let me throw THIS in the mix, one of the ladies in question actually lives about an hour and a half away (possibly two hours considering the venue).  So her?  Her, I can almost see not accepting - just on distance alone.

So tell me, what say you, Blogland?