May 14, 2010

You guys totally rock! And an update....and oh my gosh, I haven't used this many parentheses in I don't know how long!

First of all thank you all, from the bottom of my heart, for your kind and wonderful words of support.  Mrs. Lovely has even stepped up and agreed to be my alibi should I act on the feelings of murderous intent that I have toward the ex-boss.  You guys are AWESOME beyond words.

When I wrote yesterday's post I was terrified.  When Hubby gave me the news - I can't even begin to describe how I felt.  I felt like someone had punched me in the stomach.  The shock was horrific.  Today's not so bad. I'm a bit worried but not gut-wrenchingly sick like yesterday.  It's amazing how your mind/body can absorb that kind of shock and just move on like, seemingly, nothing is wrong.

Hubby went out with a friend last night and tied one on.  And I don't blame him one bit.  In fact, I was kinda surprised that they made it home as early as they did.  I had planned to sit at home and quietly tie one on; but my dear friend came by (wife of the guy hubby went out with) and we just sat and talked.  And that's what I really needed.

I had thought I might stay home today with Hubby and work through some things.  But when morning came, I went to work.  A couple of  thing factored into this decision.  One - he needs time to de-compress.  His job was very stressful.  So stressful that I figured I could call it murder if he had a heart attack or something while on the job.  And two - what good would my staying home - worrying - do?  Not much.  Oh - and yeah - that whole, annoying problem I have kicked in - it's called a work ethic. *sigh*  So I went to work.

As I mentioned yesterday, the financial situation isn't the best - but it's not too terribly bleak.  So, on that front, I'm okay . . . for now.  And at least, with my company, our health insurance is covered.  One less thing to worry about.

The worst is the uncertainty of it all.  Right now the job market really, really sucks.  We live in a smaller city, town, whatever - where there is not much call for what Hubby does and is really good at.  Then, dare I say it, there's his age.  An applicant of his age and experience is not a desirous choice.  Why?  Because with age and experience you expect/demand a higher salary - so of course some newbie whose salary requirements are lower is much more attractive.  And this is what we think happened here.

Hubby saw a job advertisement listed a few weeks ago that sounded suspiciously like his job.  We joked (can you believe?) about what if it was his?  Then his boss gave some big raises to a few of Hubby's key employees saying that they deserved these raises (although one really didn't (he's a slacker & a complainer) and he'd been saying for the last two years that there was a salary freeze on -so the sudden change of heart?  Suspicious).  Hubby's theory (that we have yet to prove) is that they've hired someone to replace him already - for much less money (and between us? Hubby wasn't making nearly enough for what he did - or for that matter, enough to justify letting him go for "financial" reasons but since his isn't a "visible" position it was probably the easiest to cut) and that those raises were given to keep key people from jumping ship.  Time will tell if that theory pans out.  And if it does?  It will be interesting to see how long the "new guy" puts up with all the crap that this job entails.....

I haven't had a chance to talk to Hubby to see what his state of mind is today.  Yesterday he was scarily calm (sooooo not like him).  But before he went out, I could see that he was getting angry.  Today we've been like ships crossing in the night.  He was still asleep when I left (the residuals of last night I'm sure...) and he only called once (as usual) this morning and didn't stay on the phone to chat.  When I arrived home he was off carting Man-Child to meet up with friends for dinner and a movie.  I think Hubby had planned to join in for dinner (which apparently he did - as here it is an hour and a half later.....).

Man-Child took it rather well last night.  But I know he is worried.  But such a sweet boy he is - he left a note for his dad to find this morning that basically told him how much he loved him and that in the whole scheme of things it was only a job and that he had the important things - us.  I cried when I read it (hell, I am almost crying just remembering it!)  Despite my complaints - and my one attempt to give him away on Twitter (I almost had Brighton Mum-Teenage Angst convinced that she should take him!) - I think I'll keep Man-Child around a bit longer.

So far, I've only told two people - friends from work.  Because seriously?  How do you broach that subject?  "Good morning!  How are you?  Did you have a good evening?  Cute shoes! So guess what...."  Talk about an instant downer.  But the amount of support from them (and y'all) is amazing.  It's funny, both of them immediately suggested that Hubby should do something that involved cooking (yes, they've tasted the culinary delights that he's been known to produce).  Who knows, maybe this will lead him down that path (although he doesn't have the "training" for it).  God knows, he couldn't run a restaurant - too much pressure, but catering on a small scale maybe? 

So, at this point, who knows what the future holds.  But this much has been determined, with the love and support of friends (yes that includes you) and family, we will face it together and we will be fine.  We WILL be fine.


  1. Yes, Gigi, you WILL be fine. Hubby WILL find something else. Your attitude is brilliant, its a positive, a new door opening. And I know I said I would take MC for you, but only in a swap for 2 of mine! But with a young man as sweet as he is with that thoughtful note, I'll take him anyway.

  2. Gigi, I'm sorry I missed yesterdays post a bit behind here!
    Anyway if I can battle being the only person earning, I know you will. Hubby WILL find a job because he has more balls than mine (who secretly loves being at home with Car but he doesn't know I now!!)
    Will swap MC for two girls! Only thing is must tell him - wales = less freedom than he has now!

  3. Now that sounds more like spunky Gigi! Hey, if worse comes to worse, you can always come back here. (that was a joke, it's much prettier where you are and not nearly as hot)

  4. To Do List:

    Church Sunday:

    Gigi and family in prayer book. (consider it done)

  5. I agree, you WILL be fine.

    And regarding the note you left on my blog: yes, I'm in Wyoming but we drive down to Denver for the airport. There is a tiny one near us but you have to pay an extra $200 per ticket. So it's just cheaper to go to Denver. And in North Carolina, not sure if I'll be by you, my husband's family is in Fayetteville.

  6. Love, as awful as the job market is people who work hard, have skills and aren't fixated on getting an exact replica of their lost job tend to find work that at least covers them in the financial-crisis terms.

    My sister called me a couple of nights ago, after performing miracles despite the current economic crisis my BIL was let go.

    He is starting a new job on Tuesday, despite them having been braced for several months of belt tightening and sleepless nights.

    The bosses that fire the wrong people tend to come unstuck during these times because they don't have the business acumen to survive in anything other than times of plenty, don't run him over, which mean getting out now is not necessarily a bad thing, because when an entire company, better to be ahead of the game.
    workforce hits the job market they bugger up supply and demand.

    Big huge fat hug for the shock, the worry and the pain we feel when our mate is kicked in the gut, many thoughts coming your way for new, greener pastures and a sliver lining from the big nasty black cloud.

    Love Sarah

  7. The "don't run him over" was not a subliminal message shoved into a paragraph randomly.

    It was part of an important point, that I evidently forgot halfway through writing my comment.

    Put it down to house renovation alzheimers.

  8. I love how you're staying positive, that is the best thing right now. And I know everything will be ok!

    P.S. What a good kid you have!

  9. I believe this is one of the hardest things to face: you can't help but feeling rejected. I wonder about the whole food thing: maybe there is a way hubby could work his way into a new career? I love your positive attitude about all this. I look forward to hearing more about how it all plays out.

  10. I am a great believer in what goes around comes around, but we too are lacking on the Karma front. I also underdstand the permenant knot feeling in your tummy

  11. You'll ride the whole roller coaster of emotions before this is all over, but you are right--you will be fine! I send you lots of good thoughts!

  12. I admire you positive attitude!! It is so hard but you do have each other.

  13. Of course you all will and what a wonderful boy you've got! He's clearly really close to his Dad and the love in your family is worth more than anything! You're strong and gutsy and I'm sure you're all going to be just fine!

  14. Oh Gigi - Just been catching up - so sorry to hear about Hubby's job - that really stinks. Especially the way it was handled. I hope he finds something really soon xxx

  15. Sweetie, I couldn't have said it better. You guys will be fine. Period. End of story. In the grand scheme of things, this'll be a blip that leads to something better.

    As easy as it is to dwell on the possibility of hubby's old boss being a scumbag (we've basically already determined this anyway), why not go the other way? Remember: Living well is the best revenge.

  16. I'm reading these backwards...just wanted you to know that I am reading them xxxx