Conversations with Man-Child

Me:  .....so I know I'm not the most perfect mother in the world, but ...."

Him: [crickets chirping]

Me:  What?  I'm not the most perfect mother??

Him:  I was just about to say you were.

Me: ??? You....

Him:  I hesitated too long?

Me:  Yes!  And any brownie points you may have earned up until this point are GONE!

Him:  Am I the most perfect son?

Me:  Of course.

Him:  No I'm not are you wouldn't yell at me all the time.

Me:  No, then you wouldn't be normal.

Him:  Yes, I would - I'd just be perfect.

Me:  If you were perfect what would I have to blog about?

Him:  Don't blog about me.

*********

Him:  It's my birthday!

Me:  Yes, it is.

Him:  You know, before I was born, there was no color.

Me:  What??

Him:  Yeah, before I was born the world was just black and white.

Me:  What??

Him:  It's true.  It's just like that movie.  Everything was black and white.  And then....I was born.

Me:  [sipping chardonnay thinking - where did this kid come from??]