Totally Random...and then, not so much

Totally random today.  I'm a bit out of sorts.  Maybe I'll detail all that at a later date.....

First things first - my Blackberry.  Really?  Why is it not updating my blog stuff?  It has my blog on there - but hasn't added any of my friends or any of the blogs I follow.  It updates what I write and your comments - but that's it.  It's making me crazy.  Maybe I should break out the tutorial cd......that just seems like too much work though.

I've been rather quiet on the commenting side of things lately.  Mainly, because I'm trying really, really hard to stay off the internet at work.  It's not working so much.  I still read (quickly) and then jump off (before Big Brother notices) with the intention of commenting when I get home.  Guess what?  I have a short attention span (and a memory to match apparently) and then totally forget (mainly because Man-Child is hogging the computer all the time!  Homework, my eye!! Does he really think I was born yesterday? This is SOOO why I need my own computer for Christmas - somebody tell Hubby.)  (Actually, come to think of it - this one was supposed to be mine!  Hmmm - wonder how they got a hold of it??)

Got a bit of Christmas shopping done yesterday (yes, via the Internet....at work (you busted me)).  But it HAD to be done.  I've been going crazy realizing how far behind (I think) I am.  Why is it that ALL of the shopping falls to the wife?  I mean really - they are YOUR family!  (Don't you think you could at least give me some ideas, if not actually shop for them?)  You (acutally meaning you, dear reader and not Hubby anymore) do realize that Christmas is little more than a month away don't you?  How did this happen???  Last time I looked it was July!

The computer is totally pissing me off right now because I've only had it out for for about 10 minutes and already the little battery icon-thingy is showing that more than 1/2 the power is gone!  WTF?  What is the point of having a laptop if you have to keep it plugged in all the damn time?  Really??  I mean I can type pretty fast - but no one can type that fast.

Okay - I've got it plugged in.  Now I can slow down and think before typing.  So everything before now?  Ignore because it probably doesn't make any sense because I was under PRESSURE!

Man-Child has been in a really chatty mood today.  These happen few and far between lately.  It's a far cry from when he was a little one and you simply could not get him to stop talking EVER.  He used to tell you all kinds of stuff.  Whatever was on his mind.  Then he reached a phase where he would play this game; what color do you like more Mommy; red or pink?  Red.  Ummm, what color do you like more Black or pink.  Black. Green or pink?  Purple or pink?  It went on and on.  He tried his darnedest to make me pick pink - because I was a girl.  He played this game with EVERYTHING.  Drove me batty.  (He was also very chauvinistic as a little guy.  I've done my best to beat that out break him of this - don't know where it came from - he was born that way; must be from his father's side of the family.)

Then he moved on to his Game-Host phase.  This was when Who Wants to Be a Millionaire first came on TV (with Regis).  He absolutely LOVED this show (as he did most game shows - anybody remember SuperMarket Sweep?  His absolute favorite).  Then it was constant questions in game show format.  Actually it was kind of cute; at first.

Now we are at the phase where we have to drag every little piece of information out of him.  Sometimes water-torture has to be deployed.  But today - from the time he got up he wanted to have conversation.  Real conversation (that didn't involve him or his personal life, of course).  He wanted to talk about a piece we saw on the news the night before.  He even turned the car radio OFF to continue this discussion.  The conversation then moved on to choices and how they can impact your life.  Choices about what classes he should take now to help him in college; how some majors aren't all they are cracked up to be and how you have to really think about what you choose to study in college - because it may not lead you down the path you would ultimately like to go.  You know, kinda heavy stuff.  It was great because I was able to impart what little wisdom I have without it sounding all lecture-y.  Which I try hard not to do since Hubby does that soooo well.  So well that we people have a tendency to tune him out; I'm just saying.

Anyway, I just walked through the living room and overheard Man-Child and Hubby having an intelligent conversation about hurricanes and living below sea-level, etc.  So, apparently Man-Child's need for conversation has lasted throughout the day.  A minor miracle.

I am consistently proud of this child (when I'm not tearing my hair out over minor things like laundry piling up in EVERY FREAKING ROOM OF THE HOUSE! Why can said laundry NOT find it's way to the hamper??) but when he is in this mode?  I am most proud - because he CAN carry on a conversation; logically and intelligently - with any adult (just usually not us).  It's a glimpse of the man he will (too soon) become, if we can navigate these next few years carefully and successfully.

But then, I have that niggling fear in the back of my head.  I remember my cousin.  She was soooo smart.  She was on the right track.  And then....it all fell apart.  Many, many issues came out.  She became involved in drugs and alcohol.  She was sidelined for YEARS.  Thank God, she has finally come to terms with the issues and kicked the drugs and alcohol; but when I look at all the years wasted before she has finally returned to the road where she was meant to be....my heart breaks.  She had a bright future before her.  She had goals - she was going to be a doctor.  Now....she's almost fifty.  Yes, she's graduated college and is going for her Masters (I believe); but what has the world missed - her dreams of being a doctor - totally sidelined.  All because she deviated from her path.  And it happened almost over night (at least from what I can remember).  And this is the deep fear that I have for Man-Child.  Because yes, he is a good kid.  Yes, he has goals and dreams.  But all it takes is one wrong turn....

I suppose this is every parents nightmare that we shove down deep and try not to think about.  Because it could never happen to our kid(s).  But it can, and having seen it first hand....

Okay, this was soooo not where this post was going when I started; but there you go.  Once you start writing it just all seems to come out - whether you want it to or not; whether you expect it to or not.

So on that depressing note.....