So.... I finally talked to my friend that's been avoiding me.
Oh. My. Hell.
Talking to her made me come inside and kiss my family.
Her life is hell. Absolute and total hell.
My heart is breaking for her.
She is a good person. A beautiful person. A person who has made bad choices in her life - and is living with the consequences of those choices.
She admitted that she'd been avoiding me. She admitted that she envied me. (ME?? Of all people? Truly, I'm the last person I'd envy)
She said she was embarrassed about what her life had become. It hadn't turned out the way she'd envisioned it so many years ago. (Really?? How many of our lives have turned out the way we'd planned? If my life had turned out the way I expected, I'd be living the high life in NYC; instead of in the suburbs in NC)
I want to be her friend. I want to help her through her hard times. Do I have the strength and fortitude for it? I don't know. Her problems are large. But I will try.
I will listen when she needs me. I will offer encouragement where I can. It breaks my heart that she is in the predicament that she finds herself in.
As Hubby constantly reminds me; I am a different person. I am (in his words) stronger and tougher than some. I don't know about that. Even so it amazes me that people find themselves in these types of situations.
All I know for sure is that I love this woman. Warts and all. We have been through so much together. Both good and bad. And I pray that I can be there for here when she needs me. And that she will get it all together and go forward - and find the life that she deserves.